The Lavender Files, part 5
Understanding Dysregulation. A musical interlude. A word on Bowie and Prince.
If you’re new to this series, dive right in here or circle back to the earlier posts, which are readily findable via the Departures section. Don’t miss the contextualizing Preface for those wondering how the heck we got here.
Without further ado…
Today: Understanding dysregulation.
The term “dysregulation” has gained currency in recent years and for good reason. It is essential to understand when your system—nervous and endocrine systems, primarily—is in a state of dysfunction, and learn to bring it back within a functional range. For acting out of dysfunction will only lead to dysfunctional action. In that sense, dysfunction is an ‘inside job.’
Understand that you have a certain range of tolerance when it comes to stress. This is true of many forms of stress, and involves many different biochemical pathways, but for these purposes we can generalize and simply say “stress.” Within that range, your system adapts, and you maintain functionality. Outside that range, you go into dysregulation, which leads to dysfunction.
The important point is to learn to recognize what dysregulation feels like, and from there to short-circuit the process and return yourself to a regulated state. However, recognizing dysregulation can be tricky. Without practice, it is typical to blame circumstances rather than own one’s inability to adapt to them. There is no shame in this limited ability to adapt, however. Such is the nature of embodied life. What can help is to learn the tell-tale signs of dysregulation. These differ somewhat from one person to the next, but may include: fretfulness, blaming, hyperventilation, restlessness, racing thoughts, short-temperedness, sullenness, despair. Certain physical symptoms may correlate as well, such as chest or abdominal tightness, jaw clenching, and so on. Learn to recognize these signs in yourself, first of all. This takes practice because, again, it is always easier to attribute the ‘problem’ to an external source.
Once you can identify when you’re in a state of dysregulation, the next step is learning to bring yourself back. This is both easy and difficult: easy because it requires “doing” nothing, and difficult for the same reason. Take some time out from trying to fix or work on anything external. Switch to soothing activities or non-activities. Depending on circumstance and proclivity, these might include taking a bath, cuddling with animals, listening to music or a guided meditation, coloring, and so on. Doing games or puzzles can be helpful (if not too difficult or competitive), since when you engage in play, you are implicitly telling your system that everything’s alright.
Your blood sugar may require stabilization; avoid refined sugar and processed foods at these times (and in general), as these choices only pass the dysregulation onto your metabolic system.
--
An interlude: in defence of fun!
Here you must picture us big-headed aliens getting in formation in our matching outfits and kicking off a musical number extolling the virtues of having a gay ol’ time. Ready?
[melody is very brash, retro broadway musical number - Djed]
It is isn’t optional (it’s fun!)
So don’t resist…
You need a daily dose
Of the utterly uttermost
Pure uncut ridonculous
We could go on at length
About fun’s important role
And the necessity
Of letting it all go…
But what fun would that be
(oh, mediocrity)
To take a fun subject
And make it dull and slow
(oh, oh, oh)
Fun – there’s really nothing to it
Have fun – even aliens can do it
Go blow off some steam
For this galactic dream
Can wait 5 minutes
--what’s the big hurry—
You’ve made it this long,
So try not to blow yourselves up
For the duration of a silly song—
Have…..fun!!!
(Bow)
* this message brought to you by your local galactic benevolent society’s association for the non-extinguishment of sentient life. Have a nice day!
Someone overheard me saying I wasn’t sure if the aliens had much sense of humor. Touché.
As one of your Zen masters put it, “what we’re doing here is so important, we better not take it too seriously.”[1]
I have some guesses as to who around here may be from your neck of the cosmic woods: Prince? David Bowie?
Two for two. They were rather successful examples of the grafting we spoke of.
[1] D.T. Suzuki